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Happy Epic Chanukah

de Rachel Bloom

[Shaina]
Yo, rachel and I both just got dumped!

[Rachel]
Yeah, and you know what? We're better off, rob

[Shaina]
Damn right. It's time to have a girl's night

[Rachel]
Yeah, it's time to have a girl's night
Let's start singing now

[Shaina]
Baby, ever since you left
I've been lookin' so damn fine
I'm feeling like myself again
It's about goddamn time

[Rachel]
Baby, ever since you left
I've been eatin' a lot of cheese
I haven't showered in three days
And I'm sleeping with my dog, louise

[Rachel and shaina]
We don't need a man
I'm better off alone
We don't need a man

[Rachel]
I don't deserve love

[Shaina]
Gettin' ready for the club
Jammin' to my favorite song
Got my short short skirt and my high high heels
And my red lipstick on

[Rachel]
Gettin' ready for the club
And by club, I mean the bath
Got my short short skirt, my high high heels
And write rob's name on my arms in red lipstick

[Rachel and shaina]
We don't need a man
I'm an empowered woman
We don't need a man

[Rachel]
I made a life-size replica of you out of socks you left at my apartment

[Shaina]
Oh, I'm stronger now without you holding me back

[Rachel]
Oh, I'm stronger now from carrying the sock man while we dance

[Shaina]
I should have left you a long time ago

[Rachel]
I shouldn't have been fat

[Rachel and shaina]
We don't need a man
(Don't need a man!)
We don't need a man
I'm better off alone

[Rachel]
Shut up! Stop, stop! Come on, this is so fake!
You always told me that eric was the love of your life
Don't you miss him?

[Shaina]
Yes, I do!

[Rachel]
Pathetic. I'm pregnant!

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