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I've Lost Everything Now

de Phillipa Soo

I saved every letter you wrote to me
From the moment I read them
I knew you were mine
You said you were mine
I thought you were mine

Do you know what Angelica said
When we saw your first letter arrive?
She said, be careful with that one, love
He will do what it takes to survive

You and your words flooded my senses
Your sentences left me defenseless
You built me palaces out of paragraphs
You built cathedrals

I'm re-reading the letters you wrote to me
I'm searching and scanning for answers in every line
For some kind of sign
And when you were mine
The world seemed to burn
Burn

You published the letters she wrote to you
You told the whole world
How you brought this girl into our bed
In clearing your name
You have ruined our lives

Do you know what Angelica said
When she read what you’d done?
She said, you’ve married an Icarus
He has flown too close to the Sun

You and your words obsessed with your legacy
Your sentences border on senseless
And you are paranoid in every paragraph
How they perceive you
You, you, you!

I'm erasing myself from the narrative
Let the future historians wonder how Eliza reacted
When you broke her heart
You have torn it all apart
I'm watching it burn
Watching it burn

The world has no right to my heart
The world has no place in our bed
They don’t get to know what I said
I'm burning the memories
Burning the letters that might have redeemed you

You forfeit all rights to my heart
You forfeit the place in our bed
You’ll sleep in your office instead
With only the memories of when you were mine

I hope that you burn

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