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Disobey

de Jarren Benton

My grandmas basement
Felt like there was no escaping
Some days felt suicidal
I was scared I would never make it
I got problems nigga, I got issues bitch
I don't want to live no more
I'm'ma let this pistol spit

Give me a therapist
That know magic tricks
Prescribe me something, nigga change my life
I need happiness, sunshine
Darkness that's all I see
I drank away my pain and popped a few pills
I can't wait to fall
Asleep
Damn I think death is calling me
Wake up and I'm still here

Like fuck I'm too scared to die
These pills and this vodka making me feel weird
I don't hang around like I used to
Paranoid that I'm'a lose her
I'm scared of what my bitch think
I know any day I might lose her
Too unstable to raise a kid
What the fuck holy shit!

I just came to this realization
Its been nine months I just noticed it
This must be a nightmare
Pinch myself, somebody awake him
I open my eyes and I wake
And I'm still right here in my grandmas basement
Noooo!

My gran'ma basement, yeah nigga my gran'ma basement
My gran'ma basement, yeah nigga my gran'ma basement
Some days I felt so scared I wouldn't make it
Some days I felt so scared I wouldn't make it
Yeah outta' my gran'ma basement
Yeah nigga my gran'ma basement
At night I can't go to sleep
I feel like someone's stabbing me
Inside of my fucking heart
Just like clock work this pain grows gradually

Actually I still have a little bit of hope
Maneuvering the anguish and shit I wrote
I ain't got patience the way I'm dope
Give a nigga one shot they like, no!
Now its back to my grandmas basement
With all this anger and this frustration
Stress can't be complacent
There he go again getting wasted
Pacing around his room so anxious
Wish I had a space ship

'Bout to go ape-shit
How much more can a nigga like me take it
Before a mother fucker go and cave in ahhh!
Fuck this rap shit, it ain't happening quick enough
My homies say I shouldn't give it up
But honestly I don't give a fuck
My girl bitching 'bout cash nigga
I'm strapped down to my last nigga
My baby hungry and need new clothes

And I swear they grow so fast nigga
These nine to fives don't pay enough
I'm about to hit the bank and go spray it up
I've got to get the fuck out this basement
These dreams and hopes ain't waiting up
This must be a nightmare
Pinch myself, somebody awake him
I open my eyes and I wake
And I'm still right here in my grandmas basement
Noooo!

My gran'ma basement, yeah nigga my gran'ma basement
My gran'ma basement, yeah nigga my gran'ma basement
Some days I felt so scared I wouldn't make it
Some days I felt so scared I wouldn't make it
Yeah outta' my gran'ma basement
Yeah nigga my gran'ma basement
I'm on the edge, fucked up in the head
I don't know who I am no mo'
I lost faith in religion
God please give me just one anticdote
I plan to blow

But I panic so much these days I can't see straight
We can't relate
Cause I'm losing it and out of my rocker
Don't know what to do with it
This music ain't lucrative
Papa keep talkin that go back to school
Bitch you sounding so ludicrous
Stuck on that stupid shit
I should be thankful while laying in the basement
Instead of the pavement

My brain is just aching
My city they sleeping
They hating
But fuck 'em I eat 'em
I'm packing my shit up this evening
I can't turn back
Fuck that
Shit, damn it I'm leaving
Got to get out of here find my way
My sanity's slipping
I'm'ma go crazy

Got to make moves
What's it goin' take me
I'm stuck on my own
No one saves me
So what you gonna do when there's no where to go
And the world seems cold
And the pain keep aching
You finally made it
It's your worst nightmare when you lose
And you got to go back to the basement
Noooo!

My gran'ma basement, yeah nigga my gran'ma basement
My gran'ma basement, yeah nigga my gran'ma basement
Some days I felt so scared I wouldn't make it
Some days I felt so scared I wouldn't make it
Yeah outta' my gran'ma basement
Yeah nigga my gran'ma basement

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