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Both Eyes Open

de Jake Kaufman

Hey! Hey!
Women are going mad today
Hey! Hey!
Fellers are just as bad, I'll say
Go anywhere
Just stand and stare
You'll say they're bugs
When you look at the clothes they wear!

Masculine women, feminine men
Wich is the rooster, wich is the hen?
It's hard to tell 'em apart today, and say!
Sister is busy learning to shave
Brother just loves his permanent wave
It's hard to tell 'em apart today
Hey! Hey!

Girls were girls and boys were boys when I was a tot
Now we don't know who is who
Or even what's what

Knickers and trousers
Baggy and wide
Nobody knows who's walking inside!
Those masculine women and feminine men!

Stop! Look!
Listen and you'll agree with me
Things are not what they used to be
You'll see!
You say hello to Uncle Joe
Then, look again, and you'll find it's your Auntie Flo!

Masculine women and feminine men
Wich is the rooster, wich is the hen?
It's hard to tell 'em apart today, and say!
My Auntie is smoking, rolling her own
Uncle is always buying cologne
It's hard to tell 'em apart today
Hey! Hey!

You go in to give your girl a kiss in the hall
But instead you find you're kissing her brother Paul
Mom's got a sweater up to her chin
Pop's got a girtle holding him in
Those masculine women and feminine men!

My wifey is playing billiards and pool
Hubby is dressing the kiddies for school
It's hard to tell 'em apart today
Hey! Hey!

Since the Prince of Wales in ladies dresses was seen
What does he intend to be?
The King or the Queen? Ha ha!
My Grandmother buys those tailor-made clothes
Grandfather tries to smell like a rose
Those masculine women and feminine men!

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