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These New Dreams

de Holding Absence

I sat still where no-one could see me
Eden has no holes. It was easy to keep yourself preoccupied
I said I'd meet you over the border
We could sit there, safely, in order, and keep ourselves preoccupied

There was a place that I had always wanted to go
And with your hand in mine, I thought I was there already

But these new dreams
They keep me up
I'm ashamed of all the things I've felt
I'm trying to absolve myself
And I've been holding
Onto burdens
That weigh a ton and burn my flesh
I'm trying to absolve myself

It's true that
Every beautiful fruit is forbidden
You only showed your colours when bitten
So, how was I supposed to know?

Now I spend my time in the wreckage
Every day I sit and fantasise about a life
In the place that I had always wanted to go
Empty-handed; I thought I was there already

These new dreams
They keep me up
I'm ashamed of all the things I've felt
I'm trying to absolve myself
I've been holding
Onto burdens
That weigh a ton and burn my flesh
I'm trying to absolve myself

Just like the moons of mars
Maybe we were doomed to fall apart
Sometimes, you have to kill your darlings
Even if they come back to haunt your heart
I'm learning to absolve myself

Just like the moons of mars
Maybe we were doomed to fall apart

These new dreams
They keep me up
I'm ashamed of all the things I've felt
I'm trying to absolve myself
And I've been holding
Onto burdens
That weigh a ton and burn my flesh
I'm trying to absolve myself

I'm trying to absolve myself

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