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Muffin Man

de Frank Zappa

The Muffin Man is seated at the table in the laboratory of the utility muffin
Research kitchen. Reaching for an oversized chrome spoon he gathers an intimate quantity of dried muffin remnants, and brushing his scapular aside procceds to dump these inside of his shirt
He turns to us and speaks

Some people like cupcakes better. I, for one, care less for them

Arrogantly twisting the sterile canvas snoot of a fully charged icing anointment utensil he poots forths a quarter-ounce green rosette (oh ah yuk
Yuk... Let's try that again!) he poots forth a quarter-ounce green rosette near the summit of a dense but radiant muffin of his own design
Later he says

Some people... Some people like cupcakes exclusively while myself, I say, there is naught nor ought there be nothing so exalted on the face of God's grey Earth as that prince of foods... The muffin!

Girl you thought he was a man
But he was a muffin
He hung around till you found
That he didn't know nuthin'

Girl you thought he was a man
But he only was a-puffin'
No cries is heard in the night
As a result of him stuffin'

Girl you thought he was a man
But he was a-puffin'
No cries is heard in the night
As a result of him stuffin'

Bruce Fowler on trombone, Napoleon Murphy Brock on tenor sax and lead vocals, Terry Bozzio on drums, Tom Fowler on bass, Denny Walley on slide, George Duke on keyboards, Captain Beefheart on vocals and soprano sax and madness. Thank you very much for coming to the concert tonight! Hope you enjoyed it! Goodnight, Austin, Texas, wherever you are!

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