Diary Of A Trying Man

de Dax

I keep trying to move on
I GPS all my thoughts
But they lead me to places
That gon' hurt me inside
I've been trying to stay strong
But when the memories spawn
I gotta chase 'em with whiskey
'Cause they run on my mind
Can't turn the radio on
Because they only play songs
That take me back to those days
And all those late-night drives
When you'd lay on my arm
Tell me what I do wrong
And I would look in your face
And say but girl I try
I'll try, I tried, I tried to be
The man that you wanted
But I couldn't provide

21, I was young, dumb, living
Chasing dreams
Trying to go from a boy to a man
I gave my heart to a pretty little demon
Who was asking for the world
And a Disney romance
She valued money
Not the substance that I had
I was building for the future
But she couldn't understand
That a diamond only shines
Overtime under pressure that's applied
From my disciplined hand

She let me go then she moved away
Said she could do better
And I was a man she could replace
Said I wasn't worth it and the memories
That we had made was just
Wrong time, wrong place
And all a mistake

Now I'm moving at a different pace
Don't blame me for moving on
Because you couldn't wait
You left to find yourself
And found out what we had was great
Our cities way too small
To act like we ain't never date
And now your banging on my line
I ain't calling you back
You used to race all on my mind
Now my life's on track
You ain't gon' waste no more of my time
'Cause I'm not that you man
You knew from the past
That gave you a chance

You used to think that it was all a game
Looking back girl
I think that I'm the one to blame
I'm setting boundaries
I'm not the same
Don't call 'cause I blocked you on everything

And if I ever come across your mind
I hope you think about those late-night drives
And tell yourself I didn't deserve those lies
Those words, those fights
I tried, I tried