Depression

de Dax

I can't find myself
I get lost inside my brain
I think I might need help
But I pushed all of 'em away
I took the cards they dealt
And there's nothin' I can change
So when I'm by myself
I just pray for brighter days

Sometimes I sit and I reminisce 'bout the good times
Wish I could get those back
I keep on runnin' these races that go in my mind
And they go on these tracks
I'm not ready to erase all my memories
I fight depression
And I let it get the best of me
Now there's nowhere to run, nowherе to go
Look around, there's liquor bottles all on the floor
Fillin' up the space inside my heart
And my home
Drownin' out these thoughts
Until they leave me alone

These thoughts are drainin' all my energy
I try to tell 'em to God
They said I'm goin' insane
And then they recommended therapy
And I go and talk to a man
Who's gettin' paid to explain
He started saying that
The chemical imbalance is the reason that my brain
Ain't connectin' to accomplishments
Associated with movin' on in life and passive things
That my heart cannot contain
So the happiness won't sustain
And he read me my options
He said: Here goes a pill
Only take two, eat a meal
And it'll numb how I feel
(Numb how I feel)

I can't find myself
(Can't find myself)
I get lost inside my brain
I think I might need help
(Think I might need help)
But I pushed all of 'em away
I took the cards they dealt
(Took the cards they dealt)
And there's nothin' I can change
So when I'm by myself
(When I'm by myself)
I just pray for brighter days

Should I drown all these thoughts
Or should I leave 'em to float?
I got all of my flaws livin' inside of this boat
I've been anchored in pain
The weight is makin' me choke
It's gettin' harder to breathe
It's pullin' right at my throat
I've been hopin' for change
But don't know how to restart
They say you ain't a man
When you're exposin' your heart
Then they say you insane until it tears you apart
And then it cuts you so deep
And they can tell by the scars
We can only see change
When we accept who we are
Try to run from the shame and you will never get far
Don't you bottle the pain and live your life in the dark
You're meant to break from those chains
And shine as bright as a star

Don't you ever tell yourself that your depression
Is the reason you won't make it
Or that happiness is not in your cards
With our God, you can beat all the odds
Keep your faith and you'll never be lost and say

I can't find myself
I get lost inside my brain
I think I might need help
(I think I might need help)
But I pushed all of 'em away
(I pushed all of them away)
I took the cards they dealt
And there's nothin' I can change
So when I'm by myself
I just pray for brighter days