Grim Fandango

de Dan Bull

Hello!
So, alot of people want to know what MC stands for
Is it, uh, 'microphone controller'?
Nope
Is it 'Master of Ceremony'?
Nope, certainly not
It's Minecraft!
And I am Dan Bull

I've got to admit
I rather like playing Minecraft
Even though the graphic style's
Older than an iron bath
Creative's great but on survival
I am crap
It's like the beginning of Oblivion
With the giant rats
Swingin' my fists around
And all I hit's the ground
This shit's tricky
And I'm not spittin' about the Bristol sound
Wish I could be whipping out
A pixelated pistol, pow!
Pigman down
Now let's hit the town
Before I got this game I promise you
I did go out
But I've given it up for bricks
I'm clinically addicted now
I need my fix
Or else I'll never leave my little house
Until I make it bigger
When my finger simply clicks the mouse
It fills me with a sensation of power
That's why I'm building me a sensational tower
To compensate for the shame
When I gaze down in the shower
I've played for hours
I need to wee, so later
I'll have to change my trousers

Just one more block
And I swear I'll stop (Swear I'll stop)
Just one more block
And I swear I'll stop (Shush)

Never mind beta blockers
I'm playing beta
And the blocks keep dropping
Like SEGA's stocks lately
Watch
I'm taking mobs down
Like a crazy cop
It'll take a hand amputation
To make me stop
Go figure
My axe and crafting table made me lots
Gold digger
Bigger than Kanye and Jamie Foxx
Behaving like an 80's b-boy
Breaking rocks
Remaking the Museum of Buildings
At Avoncroft
It's like a Lego set
With infinite bricks
And no chance of your vacuum cleaner
Pickin' up the bits
When I feel philosophical
I sit and look at it
And think I'd rather dig
Than touch Vanessa Hudgens' tits
It's like a game of Jenga
Without your friends beside
And there's a side
I'm quite eager to emphasize
Of course it's a geeky venture
Are you then surprised
Someone made a life-size model
Of the Enterprise?
I went and tried that myself
But I got bored quick
Although I still managed to replicate
The Borg ship
And all it took
Was one brick
And one click
I know what you're thinking
No need to say it
I'm sick