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If I Surrender

de Citizen Soldier

Lately I've been feeling so ashamed
By these thoughts I'm hiding in my brain
'Cause I've been holding them down
But they twist me violently
I'm hanging by a thread tonight
But this time I don't wanna be saved

So, let me fall
Let me break under everything unsaid
Just let me die
Because I can't take living
With what's in my head
If I surrender, surrender
To the monsters in me
If I surrender, surrender
To the monsters in me
Will it set me free?

What's the point of holding on like this
When no one seems to care if I exist
There is no agony like being strong
When no one knows you're sick
So sick of hearing I should stay
When I know I would never be missed

So, let me fall
Let me break under everything unsaid
Just let me die
Because I can't take living
With what's in my head
If I surrender, surrender
To the monsters in me
If I surrender, surrender
To the monsters in me

If you could see under my skin
You'd realize why I hold it in
Why it's a fight I don't wanna win
Why it's a fight I don't wanna win

If you could see all my abuse
And spend a day inside my shoes
You'd realize why I just wanna lose
You'd realize why I just wanna lose

Will anyone believe the hell of being me
Before I decide to be the dying proof
So, let me fall
Let me break under everything unsaid

Just let me die
Because I can't take living
With what's in my head
If I surrender, surrender
To the monsters in me
If I surrender, surrender
To the monsters in me
Will it set me free?

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