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Airegin

de Benny Golson

I'm sitting here and waiting in this institution chair
The perfume of incontinence hangs heavy in the air
I'd like to read the paper, but I've forgotten how to read
A chance I might remember the name I used to be
My eyes are failing quickly, doesn't matter much these days
I mutter in the silence, it's just my peculiar ways
My mind's begun to crumble and my legs have given out
I'm laughing then I'm crying while the others scream and shout
Seven years or so I'm told that I've been sitting here
I used to be a someone, but that status is now gone I fear
My teeth they get collected so that I don't cause offence
Food is liquidised and the radio makes little sense
The photographs beside my bed are people I once knew
I know that I should recognise them, even just a few
In moments of great insights I might shake my fist with rage
But mostly I just sit here; I'm neither a clown nor a sage
I used to be a soldier, that was many years ago
When I can remember I've a medal that I'd like to show you
People who say they knew me, say I used to dance and sing
And play the pipe and whistle; I was married, there's a ring..
Did I love my wife so dearly and my children and their
games
I've forgotten what they look like, their faces and their
names
But in my dreams and visions I can see them very dear
Couldn't tell you where they are now, but I loved them
very dear
The Circuits in my mind have blown the wiring in my
head
When I die I wonder if I'll know that I am really dead?
Nothing seems to make much sense upon this time I
dwell
I'll drink my institution drink and sit another spell.
I'd love to smoke a cigarette and smell the new mown
hay
I'd love to hold a woman close and dance the night away
If I could just remember all the things I loved to do
Perhaps I wouldn't be sitting here... perhaps it would be
you
I might have been a prophet or a wise man or a fool
I might have had a kingdom over which I ruled
Maybe I was someone who no one really knew
Maybe I'm still sitting here alone and so confused

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